Tone Lōc - Funky Cold Medina (Lyrics)

Artist/Group: Tone Lōc
Album: Lōc-ed After Dark
Released: 1989
Label: Delicious Vinyl

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"Funky Cold Medina" is a hip hop song written by Young MC, Matt Dike and Michael Ross, and first performed by American rapper, actor and producer Tone Lōc. It was the second single from Lōc's debut album, Lōc-ed After Dark (1989). The single was released on March 18, 1989, and rose to number three on the Billboard Hot 100 the following month where it went platinum, selling over one million copies and becoming the second ever platinum-certified rap single (after "Wild Thing" from the same album being the first). It peaked on the UK Singles Chart at number 13 in May of that year.

According to Flavor Flav, who is heard using the phrase "cold medina" a year earlier on It Takes a Nation of Millions to Hold Us Back, "cold medina" was one of his assertive affirmations throughout the 1980s and was adopted by labelmates Beastie Boys as a nickname for the cocktail known as a "fuzzy navel"; Flav allegedly later advised Tone Loc to use the catchphrase in a song.

The song contains several samples. The drum break is from "Get Off Your Ass and Jam" by Funkadelic, and the main guitar riff is from "Hot Blooded" by Foreigner. Other samples are taken from "(I Can't Get No) Satisfaction" by the Rolling Stones (when this song is mentioned in the lyrics), "Christine Sixteen" by Kiss, "All Right Now" by Free and "You Ain't Seen Nothing Yet" by Bachman–Turner Overdrive. The cowbell sample is from "Honky Tonk Women" by the Rolling Stones.

After the song became popular, several different cocktails were introduced bearing the name "Funky Cold Medina".

The song tells of Tone Lōc's experiences with "Funky Cold Medina", an aphrodisiac beverage. Lōc asks a fellow bar customer how he is having such success with women. The stranger says it is due to Funky Cold Medina, which makes anyone who drinks it irresistible.

Lōc tests the formula on his dog, who becomes uncharacteristically affectionate towards Lōc and attracts the neighborhood dogs to Lōc's house. Lōc then tries it on potential love interest Sheena, but upon returning to Lōc's home Sheena turns out to be a man, whom he ejects from his apartment forthwith. (While homophobia was endemic in 1980s rap, Lōc expresses this choice more as a practical matter, in a coded reference to the AIDS epidemic.) Next he appears on Love Connection and meets a woman who immediately wants to marry him, which freaks him out. Lōc concludes the formula just brings trouble and resolves not to use it.

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